When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Holy sore nipples Batman
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Randomize
