this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize