Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
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