idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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