naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
