do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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