i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I need to align my fucking chakras
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
