no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
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Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Why is your signature on my underwear?
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
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You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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