Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Randomize
