Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
