Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
