"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.