we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Randomize
