i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
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guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
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I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.