I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
People with herpes should wear stickers.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss vodka workout Fridays
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize