You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize