i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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