What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
