Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
