Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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