I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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