Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
