i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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