Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
