Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
this must be what syphilis tastes like
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.