I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize