They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
