I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
