Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
