Heybabeimwearingurpanties
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
