Got a toothbrush?
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize