No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
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