I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
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You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
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He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize