Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
