is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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