I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
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