But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
