Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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