No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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