ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
