I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
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