If you die in college, do you die in real life?
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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