Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
