is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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