honey bunches of taint.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I am available for nakedness
Randomize
