i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
