Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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