hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
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i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
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He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.