The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize
