just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
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