i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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