Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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