i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize