Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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