I cockslap morals
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
